For a long time, I believed I was doomed. I used to believe that I couldn’t do anything properly, and that I was doomed to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. I was encouraged to believe this by a toxic person, who made it appear like every negative thing happened to me. It took years for me to realize that I had fallen prey to the blame game, which was both convoluted and deceptive.
I no longer hold myself responsible for everything that goes wrong; in fact, I actively combat those who would hold me responsible for their own mistakes. In addition, I teach others about the types of people who are likely to engage in such behavior.
Who takes the blame for others’ misfortunes?
Some people follow this rule to the letter. They have grown accustomed to constantly getting what they want, receiving attention, and blaming others for their misfortunes. When someone tries to place the blame on you, pay close attention to the minor nuances. In some cases, they may be playing the blame game, and sadly, it may be a part of their character. Manipulators who are masters of this method include the following individuals.
This “victim” will always be “victimized.”
Getting through to the everlasting “victim” can be challenging if you’ve ever met one. They may appear to be innocent at first, but their words and actions can be harmful to those around them. The victim is unable to move on in life because of the victim’s reluctance to let go of past hurts and misdeeds.
As long as the “victim” can reach or talk to anyone, they will blame even the most obvious defects on them. If they lash out, it is because they were abused as children. The reason they’ve turned to crime is because of their prior misfortunes, and so on. They’ll tell you heartbreaking stories, and if you’ve ever let them down, they’ll keep reminding you of it for years to come. To them, the blame game is second nature.
Toxic manipulators like this one are hard to come by, though. Attention-seekers who don’t get it are likely to look for someone who can provide them with it. They also thrive on blaming others for their problems. It is impossible for a narcissist to be wrong or to be held responsible for everything that happens to them. People that act in this manner want you to believe that they are better than you, even when they know they are not.
For them, the depths of their inadequacy are felt to the fullest extent. They have a crippling lack of self-esteem, and they’ll do anything to prove the polar opposite to themselves and the world. Never taking responsibility for their acts is part of this. They pose a threat to one’s health and well-being.
Pathological liars are those who are unable to tell the truth.
Okay, so there’s not much else to say about this person. The pathological liar will lie about anything, even if they don’t think it’s necessary to. Even seemingly insignificant details can serve as justification for telling lies. It makes sense, then, that they would resort to playing the blame game with others.
Because they lie so much, putting the blame for their mistakes on others will be a piece of cake for them. If necessary, they will steal in order to corroborate their lies. When a compulsive liar shifts the responsibility to someone who isn’t to fault at all, it’s astonishing how inventive they can be.
A low self-esteemed individual
Trying to understand this one is a little more difficult than the others. People with low self-esteem are the last people you’d expect to shift responsibility. As a result, these people may resort to the blame game as a desperate attempt to boost their self-esteem.
This is something I, too, have been guilty of. Because of the decline in my sense of self-worth, I began seeking out ways to bring others down with me. I believed that doing so would improve my self-esteem. Sadly, this didn’t work, and the blame game concluded with worse feelings than before.
Confident but conceited
As for the egotistical or arrogant person, they will always point the finger of blame. This is something this character does on a regular basis: walking around with an inflated ego and blaming everyone else for their misdeeds. The arrogant individual is able to maintain their standing as a self-proclaimed superior human being by doing so.
It’s easy to tell an arrogant person apart from the rest of the pack. When people show off their ability to place blame on others, they don’t do anything to better themselves or the people around them. I believe that arrogant people are some of the most difficult to persuade to accept their obligations.
Okay, so I’ve admitted it. Even if your intentions are good and you despise the terms I just used, those who are obsessive about their own every move will never be held responsible for anything. Why? To concede defeat would be to relinquish control of both the circumstance and oneself, and that would be dangerous. People who are continuously looking for ways to maintain their position of power are more likely to engage in the blame game.
How are we going to get out of this rut?
It breaks my heart to think that some people will never learn to quit pointing fingers. In the past, I’ve tried to persuade people to take responsibility for their actions, but this has often resulted in hostility and animosity.
There is hope, however, if you are willing to look at yourself objectively for the first time. The “blame game” mentality may affect individuals you know, and there are ways to help.
Accepting that you might be mistaken is a crucial first step in putting an end to the blame game. You got me there. You could be to blame for the blunder that was committed! Accepting your role in the problem allows for a new beginning. We’ve arrived at the starting point, and it’s time to put an end to the sleight of hand.
We are all blessed by being able to observe things from diverse angles. Because if you’re having a hard time comprehending why someone is blaming you for a mistake, it may be because you can’t see things from any other perspective but your own. For a change, try seeing things from the perspective of someone else.
Get out of your own way.
Relax and let go of the need to control everything that happens to you. Let go of the idea that you can cure, save, or know everything. Taking responsibility for your actions becomes easier when you learn to let go of part of your power.
Take charge of your life.
This is a time to accept personal accountability for your conduct. When you make a mistake, it is your responsibility to own up to it. Instead of squandering your time and energy trying to find an excuse to ignore your problems, put that energy toward improving your weaknesses.