Something that I often hear complaints about from people is the notion of thank yous. People will often tell me that they feel insulted or upset that someone didn’t say thank you for a gift they received or for a nice deed that someone did for them. However, thank you shouldn’t be our expected response and instead, it should just be an added bonus if someone does say the phrase.
As an example, I held the door open for someone the other day while it was raining, taking great pleasure in being pelted by rain drops as I held it. As the person walked by, he didn’t say thanks, didn’t even acknowledge that I was standing there.
At first I was kind of annoyed that he hadn’t made any recognition of the fact that I was doing something for him. However, I thought more about it and it’s really a greater flaw in me than in him. He didn’t ask me to hold the door open, he hadn’t expected me to do the act. Maybe he didn’t care that I did it or simply hadn’t even noticed that I had.
Thanks is a nice way to show appreciation for what someone has done. But the deed should be done out of goodness, out of a desire to help the person. Thus, it shouldn’t make a difference if they acknowledge it or not. If you need a pat on the back to make your actions seem worthwhile, you need to rethink why you’re doing them. Give value back to the phrase thank you and don’t make it an expected response for everything you do.
Today many of us seem to forget the little things in life and how these sometimes are the big things. People use the internet to bully people and be ignorant to what they want in life. They think only of themselves. I have learned over these past 18 months of my life that I need to choose my friends better. Ones with manners is a good start.